Preface

In this day and age, families are torn apart and broken.  Parents use their children as leverage to get back at the other.  I absolutely refuse to do that! Children are meant to be children, play have fun and to be light hearted.  They are not meant to be privy to adult conversations and situations. 

I believe that two people are brought together for a reason.  That reason may not be known at first or even thought of. My ex and I were brought together to bring to our lives our 3 beautiful children. For this blogs sake, I will call them Hannah, Evan and David. 

Hannah is 9 and she is a little mini-me... attitude included!! She is my oldest.  She's very sweet and very sensitive. She's so smart, there is no way to fool her about anything!!

Even is 6 and he's gonna be my trouble maker!!  He's a good kid, but has anger and listening issues!! What kids don't, really?! LOL!!

David was our oops!  He's 5 years old and was totally unplanned!  All of our kids were unplanned, but after Evan my ex got fixed.  He refused to go back to the doctor for his checkup and 5 months later we were on our vacation in Mexico and brought back a big surprise!!

As for me and my ex(who I will call Mark), we had been together 11 1/2 years and married for 10.  When we first started out, nothing mattered except each other.  We were able to get through anything as long as we did it together.  But as time passed on and responsibilities of being parents and work and just everyday life that came along with it, we slowly grew apart. I could feel it, but thought we could get through it just like everything else. 

But Mark, oh, how he hated confrontation and feelings!  He ignored our problems, despite my constant saying so. I took on the role of homemaker.  I will be the first to admit that I was (and am not) perfect.  The house may not of been spotless or dishes always done, but the kids were fed and clean and loved!  Despite my marriage, I considered myself a single married parent. Don't get me wrong, Mark was an excellent provider and hard worker. He gave us everything that we needed physically.  Emotionally, he just didn't get it.  He didn't try to give us emotional needs.  He assumed that if we were taken care of, that would be enough.  I refused to live an emotionless life.  Between those things that's what led to Marks affair and my kicking his ass out!

So, now this is my journal of emotions and thoughts and feelings. I'm not saying any of this is right or wrong, but it's me and I will not change. So, accept me for who I am ( a loving mother who wants nothing but the best for her children, someone who likes good clean fun and who wants.... true love) or leave!

This is my journey through divorce with children...